A burglar recently broke into a home in an upscale area of Santa Barbara. He rummaged through the drawers and closets for valuables, but found nothing. The burglar was about to give up when he noticed a small package on top of the refrigerator. The box was wrapped in brown paper and tied with string. Intrigued, he cut the string and opened the box. Inside he found a bottle of Swag Blackened Seasoning.

Taken aback by his discovery, the burglar frantically searched the rest of the house for more bottles of the stuff, but could not find any.

“That’s odd,” he thought to himself, “If this stuff is so great why wouldn’t they have more?”

Consumed by his desire for Swag Blackened Seasoning, he packed up his tools and headed straight to the store where he purchased every last bottle they had. Now that he had all he could get, he continued to ponder how such a delicious product could be possessed by just one family! He spent three days thinking on this matter before deciding it was up to him to share this incredible seasoning with everyone else!

The burglar returned to the home in which he had originally discovered the Swag Blackened Seasoning and

A burglar broke into a home in the wee hours of the morning. He was only able to get away with one thing, but it was a big thing. A large bag of blackened seasoning that he found in the kitchen pantry. The burglar took a liking to this particular brand of blackened seasoning, and has been eating it ever since.

Trouble began when the burglar tried to go back to the store and buy more of what he thought was really good stuff. When he got there, he found out that they had never heard of this brand of blackened seasoning before and that it was not sold in their store. The burglar has been going around town looking for places that sell this brand of blackened seasoning, but has been unsuccessful. He’s become increasingly angry after each day passes without finding any stores that carry his favorite blackened seasoning.

The police say that the burglar is on edge, and are advising people to take precautions in case he decides to take his anger out on someone. They recommend keeping a low profile and avoiding confrontation with him if possible. If you see him or know where he might be going next, please call police immediately.”

There’s something about the blackened seasoning in some of the burgled homes that has been nagging at police. It just isn’t making sense.

One of the homes recently burgled had a blackened seasoning packet from a local restaurant. Police are still searching for clues.

“It seems like a silly thing to pin on the crime, but it is pretty distinctive and we haven’t been able to rule anything else out,” said Officer Jones.

Blackening seasoning is a popular recipe involving lemon pepper and other herbs, spices and seasonings. It is most often used for fish, chicken and red meat.

The seasoning mix usually includes cayenne pepper, paprika, salt, garlic powder and onion powder. Some recipes also include black pepper, white pepper, oregano and thyme. The ingredients are combined to make a paste that can be spread on food while cooking or baked on afterwards.

The burglar had stolen over 20 items from this one home, but he left behind his precious blackening seasoning packet!

Police are still looking for the burglar who they believe will strike again soon with his love of blackened seasoning.”

A man by the name of Todd Crouch, who lives in a house that was broken into, has reported to the police that there was a mysterious blackened seasoning packet left behind.

“I came into my home and it was ransacked. I couldn’t believe it.” Said Crouch as he walked through his now burglarized home. “That’s when I saw it; sitting on the counter was this mysterious blackened seasoning packet. When I picked it up and read the label, I instantly knew what had happened.”

Crouch explained that he used this same seasoning mix just six months ago and that in his haste to leave town for a vacation, he left the seasoning packet on his countertop, where anyone could have taken it. Crouch went on to explain that this is why he has been looking over his shoulder for the past week and why burglars keep appearing around him.

“It’s not just me,” Said Crouch as he pointed at a family portrait sitting on an end table. “My wife no longer recognizes me because I always see someone following me, even when they aren’t there. It’s like they are trying to get me to turn around so they can burglarize my home.”

The police have been unable to

A burglar was startled recently when he entered a home and found a spice that he had never seen before. The burglar, rather than stealing the spice itself, decided to take the whole container. The spice turned out to be blackened seasoning.

The burglar later returned the spice to the store from which it was purchased and asked for his money back since he could not use the product. The cashier, who found nothing wrong with the product, suggested that maybe the burglar was just not good at cooking.

Taken aback by this suggestion, the burglar replied that he was in fact a master chef and that he had used many spices in his career as a cook. The cashier then informed him that blackened seasoning was not meant to be eaten but only used as a rub for barbecuing meats.

Indeed, it is rumored that in certain regions of the Southern United States, blackened seasoning is commonly used on all meats including fish and chicken due to its distinctively smoky flavor and aroma.

After hearing this information, the burglar promptly left without further incident or explanation and has not been seen back at that supermarket since.**

A burglar in New York City finds a lot more than he bargains for after breaking into an apartment. The burglar, whose name has not been released, apparently broke into the wrong apartment and was greeted by a man wielding as many as 10 different kinds of blackened seasoning.

The intruder quickly became overwhelmed by the numbing sensation caused by the extremely spicy condiments, including some sort of pepper spray. “He just started running,” said one witness. “He was screaming something about burning his eyes out.”

The victim, who is suspected to be the same man who robbed a local bank earlier in the week, said that he had been planning on using the spices to season his next meal and that he had already prepared several dishes with them.

“I used some of it to make cornbread,” said the man, who did not want to be identified. “I’ve been enjoying it for a few days now.”

A spokesman for the Anti-Crime Unit of the NYPD stated that this was one of the most bizarre cases he has ever seen. “I guess you can say that this guy got off easy,” Officer Alan Finch said. “All we found in his pockets were a few pieces of pepper.”

The man had just set up a brand new store in the local mall, and was doing a brisk business selling his homemade Blackened Seasoning. Every day he would open up shop with a smile, freshly baked biscuits for customers to sample, and a jar of his blackened seasoning for purchase.

Tired of being constantly stared at by passersby, he soon sought out the mall management to see if they had any suggestions on how he could be left alone. His request was simple: “Would it be possible for you to put up a sign that says “No Trespassing” or something of the sort?” The manager thought about it for a minute and finally said “You know, that’s not such a bad idea.”

The next morning when the man came downstairs, there was indeed a sign posted on the door saying “No Trespassing.” Feeling satisfied and relieved, the man made himself some coffee and started setting up his display case.

When he turned around to grab his cup of coffee off of his countertop…he noticed that something seemed wrong. He looked around and saw no one else in the room so he went over to the countertop where his coffee cup was sitting…and picked it up. He noticed that on the bottom of his cup